Dear Grinch,I realize that your heart is two sizes too small, but I want you to know that you broke mine this morning. JUST when I'd found my Christmas spirit, you came and stole it from me. Literally. I wonder, what will you do with the Christmas decorations you took from my yard overnight? Will you use them to decorate your own house? More likely than that, you will probably sell them to someone else to make a few bucks. Well, I want you to know that I think you're a bad banana with a greasy black peel!!
You probably steal from lots of people, so to refresh your memory ... here's what you stole from me: (I found this picture online but they look like the same ones I had.)
I just bought those lighted presents last year. Why didn't you take the spiral trees that are 6-years old now and have a short in the cord? OH ... I know why. It's because your soul is an appalling dump heap overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable, mangled up in tangled up knots.Sorry. Your hatefulness is bringing out the grinch in me. I'm really debating whether to put up the rest of my lights now. What if you steal them too? But then again, if I don't decorate I guess I'm only punishing myself and then you win again.
In closing, the three words that best describe you, are, and I quote: "Stink. Stank. Stunk." And if you happen to read my blog, well that's just makes the whole thing even more disturbing.
Merry Christmas, JERK.
-Julie
7 comments:
If only the jerk who stole your stuff knew what it took for you to get out all the decorations and put them up!
I worked with a guy who has a ton of decorations in his yard. Seriously - he's crafty and made every Disney character out of wood, painted them, then puts them out each year (including all 101 little dalmations). Because thieves have targeted him, he's got this tethering system AND surveillance cameras. We even did a story one year when his camera caught someone trying to take the decorations and getting frustrated because he realized they were all linked!
Jerks are out there and unfortunately the season brings out even more. Don't let the jerks get you down. You still have plenty of holiday cheer INSIDE!
Wow! It is just downright pathetic that people steal Christmas decorations. I would set up some "bait" and try to catch them.
I'm so sad for you!! I've been feeling a little grinchy myself. I haven't even started decorating yet. Maybe now I won't!
How rude!! I'm really sorry someone stole your cute presents. They'll be sorry when Santa puts them on the naughty list!!
Of all the grinchy things! I hope you are re-gifted and that grinch realizes that you are the Susis-Lou-Who we all love!
I love your blog, it was so darn sad and hilarious at the same time. I know how you feel, but don't let them win. Someone once stole my Christmas money at the grocery store, the Lord takes care of it all. Leave it to him and be the happy, beautiful, honest and crazy girl you are. Everyone will answer one day.
can't you just put that sad story on TV - people will feel sorry for your and the new decorations will pour in... but seriously, who would do that. I loved catching up on all your happenings. you keep me laughing.xoxo
Post a Comment